A weekend of many events I would say the last one was..First off, families and frens decide to "attack" my humble abode. An event I most welcome ...Topped off the Sunday with a glorious BBQ at
her place. Click the below links for respective pictures..
Lebaran 2005 part IIIBBQ Galore Now on another note, something that made me angry..so angry I ended up with 2 days MC for today and tomorrow.Wat would you do if you found out a close fren whom you 've been frens with since adolescent years stabbed you behind your back yet all the while he puts up a smile in front of you joking and acting like he had done nothing wrong?I have yet to confront you about this my fren but I dun think I will either for the truth is out..It is there staring at me in the face..Telling me wat a fool I've been..
It is not a good thing my fren telling people my life stories.. stories I entrusted my closest frens with..Fabricating the stories making me seem like a bad mother and a weak wife. You see me as a weak person, so Gung HO about work yet timid as a mouse when it comes to my hubby.. Yes, he may not be the perfect hubby,many flaws he has but he is the father of my 2 children and honestly saying, I love him still as I did when I just started to know him. No matter wat he did, he has the key to my heart and I realize now that may have been the reason why I married him in the first place.
Many things I endured and went through for him, not to defend him or because I am weak. But because I love him and it is my responsibility as a wife to do so. To make my marriage work and not leave him in the lurch, struggling to make a living for OUR family.What he has done in the past he has sincerely regretted and changed that part of him. There are still areas in which he has to improve in but it takes time for someone to change. And so do I dare say I am the perfect wife? No I am not my fren..many areas in being a wife I do not excel in... yet I am grateful my hubby puts up with me..
One of the areas being that I am a young mother who is learning by no one's thumbrule but my own. You make me sound like a bad mother to someone I hardly knew.Yes, you see my frequent nites out with frens and you dun see me buying stuff for my son. But did you see the times I burned the midnite oil caring for my sick son? Not having enuff sleep to sew his beddings and curtains? The nites I can't sleep missing him while he's at his Nyais?The pain I went thru to bring him into this life? Did you see the times I forgo my own meals to save money to buy his necessities? To bring him to the doctor?Did you see the times I cried after scolding or beating my son because I wanted him to grow up to be a good person? Did you know all this?
You, my "good fren" dissapoint me. I dun know what I did to you that made you draw such a picture of me..Am I that bad a person? I am not perfect yes I know, but I have always tried my best to be a sincere and good fren.. I may be monetarily poor but I dun go around asking people I hardly know for money as wat you claim. I have never been good with money, never thinking twice to share with my frens even if I have that lil amount left. So far as I remember, you have never contributed anything in my life significant enuff for me to remember. You weren't there in my times of needs. You were not there when I needed a fren.
So, I dun think I have a need for any future communications with you. If for any reason you wish to rebuke what I have written, feel free to do so.I am shocked beyond words about wat I have found out..so shocked that I am so ashamed.. ashamed not of the stories you have been telling people but more ashamed I have been so blind I had a fren like you.
Wistful for Love
5:36 PM
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