~Happy berthday to me!!!~T'was my berthday yesterday ..... humphh ... decided to take the day off cos hubby and me planned to bring Apit to the theme park if he was better..turns out he was still coughing away ... so ended up staying at home lazing the day away ... it's boring but rather nice lah ...
The nite before I went to JB with my colleagues, shopped, ate and just whiled the time away .. Exactly at midnite hubby called and wished me a happy berthday!! Wah.. it's been a loooonnggg time since he was the first to wish me happy birthday heheh ..
then came streams of smses from my cousins and frens till the next evening ..so sweet of them to remember...
Woke up at noon on my birthday.. As her normal practice, Mum made me her traditional Birthday cake!! A big cake of glutinous yellow rice decorated with beef rendang, fried kacang panjang and fried omelette... heheh she's a darling isn't she?? she never fails to make this "cake" of hers each year on my birthday heheh sooo sweet ..Ans she cooked lots of other goodies too.. as though I was having a big birtdhay bash..hehehe
So like I said, I just lazed around the whole day, watched DVDs..played with Apit ..all in all, it wasn't the best birthday ever but still it was nice to just hang out and not worry about anything even if its just for a day ..
So to all those who remembered and wished me happy birthday, thank u very much..u have made my day..
I didn't wish for anything cos if I hoped, I would have been dissapointed so I just enjoyed the day..hehehe
Wistful for Love
8:39 AM
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~I'm so farking pissed~I know I've updated for today but I am so farking pissed... tears rolling down my cheeks as I type this entry..How can I not be angry?? I know I know it's nobody's fault but only mine..for always trying to help others yet I end up hurting myself and my own family..
Since they moved in with us, I've watched my darlin son shrink from roly poly chubby wubby boy to a skinny lil fella ... only left skin and bones like his Ayah ..haiya .. Apit used to be so healtlhy, falling sick once once in a blue moon. Now he needs to see the doctor at least 4 times a mth... he hasn't been eating either.. and coughing the nite away sleeping fitfully .. It just breaks my heart to see him shrivel down like that..From a cheerful playful boy to a cranky, sourpuss, who cries and throws tantrums at the slightest irks... pegang sikit ngangis ..usik sikit ngangis.. ngembeng tul ah ..And I AM SICK OF IT...
Sis, I pity you and your situation now but you have to get out my house ASAP!! I need to put my son first!! The whole family has been falling sick so often, everybody's sick of it.. your sickly girls can't share anything with anyone else but themselves..I have tried being there for you but all I get is headaches everyday from the frequent complaints from Mum,your girls shouting and screaming their lungs out, hubby's long face and my own inability to rest even in the comfort of my own home..I get a headache each time I step into my own house!! And its blardy affecting my work!!
I cry myself to sleep each nite as I watch my son sleep restlessly... he cries in his sleep .. I have to be mean but I dun know if I have the heart to drive my own sister and her 3 daughters out of my house??? I dunno if I can wait till August?? That's 4 long months away!!! I dunno if Apit will dissapear into thin air by then??
Ya Allah, setiap kali Kau memberiku dugaan, aku telah cuba sedaya upaya ku untuk menghadapinya dgn tabah... Tapi aku kalah bila dugaanMu membuat ku tercabar akan kesihatan dan kebahagiaan puteraku.. aku kalah Ya Allah ...
Ya Allah, Kau berilah ku petunjuk dan berilah aku kekuatan Ya Allah! Kau dugalah aku dalam segi apa pun tapi jgnlah Kau menduga ku dgn mencabar kesihatan dan kebahagiaan satu satu nyer putera ku Ya Allah.. aku tak sanggup melihat dia menderita begitu Ya Allah.. kasihanilah anak ku yg masih kecil Ya Allah ... Amin
Wistful for Love
9:14 PM
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~Monday hues~Had the weekend off but yet why am I still so tired??? Hmm mebbe cos had to layan the sickly Apit. Poor baby... On Sat, brought to Raffles Medical Group Compasspoint. He seems to be only suited with medicine form RMG.Each time I bring him to polyclinic, he doesn't seem to get better until at least 2 visits.So cut me the crap about wasting money on private clinics... cos the amount is not that much difference... and he really does seem to get better faster when he sees a Private GP rather than government poly.After doctors's visit we jalan jalan at CP. Bought for him training potty.Oh he is toilet training now.. there's a few mishapo here and there but he is doing quite well.
On Sunday, we went to my ex schoolmate's wedding. After that we jalan jalan at Tampines Mall and Century Square looking for new shoes for Apit. He was very cranky as he had a very high fever! really very hot... then we just chilled at the playground of Tampines mall to support my Cousin who's taking part in the Teenage Magazine Teenage Icon contest. By 7pm Apit really was very cranky so we went home, had a shower and the 2 of us fell asleep as soon as our heads hit the pillows.Was so tired I did take my dinner or supper...just had lunch at the wedding and now my tummy is growling so much ... and I am sooo sleepy and tried becos apit had a fitful sleep last nite... sigh... why me??? uwahhhhh...
Wistful for Love
11:36 AM
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~Wisdom teeth anyone??~Take note that I mentioned teeth and not TOOTH!! Why?? Cos I have three more of those darned tooth embedded in my gum!! One top two below! I actually had 4 of them..
In 2001 just after I got married one of the top ones gave me a loooottttt of pain. So I went to get it extracted. I went to the polyclinic first afterwhich they refered me to CGH Dental clinic. The dentist had a hard time pulling that darned tooth out. He was huffing and puffing and sweating just to pull out that tooth. He asked what milk I drank and I told him I drink HL everyday.. he laffed and said he must inform his patients not to drink HL anymore
A few days after that, I tot I was down with flu cos I had mucus and was sniffling away till I realized it was not mucus but PUS!!! ewwwwww grosss u know.!! Seems like the tooth had been embedded too deep and when it was pulled out there was a hole in my mouth thru my skull.. and since the back of our heads are hollow, the bacteria and germs collected up there and caused pus to form.. Enuff said cos just thinking about the whole procedure makes me sick again...I had to go to National Dental Ctr everyday for a week to purge out the pus and after it was finnaly cleared, I had to sew up the hole.
I was advised to pull out the other three cos the bottom two are growing horizontally and will cause my other tooth to become crooked..Morever one of them is pushing down on my nerves and there are chances the nerve will be permanently numb if I pull that tooth out. So can you blame me if I'd rather bear with the growing pain than go see a dentist??
But I can't stand the pain any longer so I am now scouting for a dentist, now contemplating if I should go back to CGH or NDC?? arghhhh!! helpppppp!!
Wistful for Love
9:42 AM
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~Why me??~I am on MC today..been sick for more than a week but had to endure and go to work cos my supervisor was on a week's leave. Now she's back in the office,I just had to take a day off. I need a break cos yesterday in the office, I had a splitting headache...
Today when I woke up, my head feels like it's gonna break into two!! I tot it was my migraine acting up again ... phew tak leh carry lah!!!So wat did Dr Tay Lay Peng diagnose me with?? Hypertension!!! yup.. I finally got it!! With a strong family history, currently overweight and heavy personal problems on my mind, I am finally down with the dreaded family curse!! So Dr Tay gave me a looooonnggggg lecture abt quitting smoking,be more relaxed and START EXERCISING TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!! Oh of cos to watch my diet too..heheh
Hmm diet wise.... I wouldn't say its hard to control cos I have always not liked salty food or oily stuff..and I don't really snack.. hmm mebbe becos I don't eat in the day and only when I reach home at nite, I have my home cooked meal, play with Apit and sleep .. heheh mebbe tats why I m so fat? Hmm dun give me the crap about eating at least 4 hours before bedtime ok... I reach home ard 8-9pm everyday, after a day at work where I sometimes do not eat the whole day so pardon me if I eat to hearts content when at home! Hmm mebbe I should start to go jogging today? The area around my estate is nice for jogging scenery...But I started off by cooking my own healthy meal today! Steamed sea bass and a dish of stir fired broccoli with carrots!!! yummy ..Turned out rather well I might say..and finished that off with some slices of Quay nee..Buah kuini lah ..mangga manis lagi bau wangi tu hehehe
Smoking wise...hmmm I've cut down a lot since I gave birth to Apit and more so since the price keeps being hacked up.. I only smoke when I go JB and buy a pack back.. even so, that big pack can last me for a week or mroe if hubby dun snitch my ciggies!!! So mebbe, just mebbe, I can try to stop altogether.The easiest way would be if I got preggy again! hehehe The previous time I stopped immediately was a few months before Apit was conceived.. hehe mother's instincts I guess.
So after listing out the possibilities of why I am down with Hypertension, I guess I've answered my own question!! That's why me!!!! ahakss
Wistful for Love
2:06 PM
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~Saturday boredom!Every Saturday nite I will find myself just lying down on the bed watching some dunno wat boring show on TV as early as 8pm... used to be different..Now weekends for my friends are for family and hardly any time during the two short days to spend with friends so we squeeze time to meet up during the hectic weekdays.. sigh is there any end to it?
So finally, after deciding that I will not sleep early tday and be a couch potato watching meaningless TV shows, I decided to change my obselete, dusty and worn out start sprinkled lay out!! Been to blogskins many times but all this while none has taken to my fancy.Not till I saw
Trina's lay out!! fell in lurve with it immediately and said now thats a lay out for me!!! ehehehe
So after some minor hitches here and there.... TA DAAAAA ..welcome to my newly revamped blog dear bloggers..hehehe drama siaks aku ni ...pardon kegairahan gue ya.. hehe maklumlah orang dah lama tak tukar kulit ..ahaks..
Wistful for Love
1:14 AM
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~Nosey neighbour me??~When I initally moved to Punggol, there were only Hubby, Apit,my mum and me in the house so after 9pm usually there's nothing much to do cos Apit's asleep, hubby's usually on the afternoon or nite shift and my mum coops herself up in her room watching her soap operas or sleeps early after her dialysis.
My house, as all Punggol houses,is the newer type with the floor to ceiling windows,plus I have a clear view of the rooftop garden with the childrens' playground right below my window. So, it's a habit for me to curl up on my sofa, watch Tv or just stare out the window. That used to be so relaxing I tell ya. Unfortunately, my windows also face the oppesite blocks' full length windows too. So at nite when all the hall lights are on in the oppesite block, I can see all the going ons there.
All sorts of people I tell ya. There's the Malay family in the 8th floor who has a tent in their hall! Yes you read correctly, a TENT! Which only folds ups during the Raya season. They usually turn all their lights off after Isyak prayer, leaving the lights on only in the rooms they are in. But they are a pious family I can tell, cos during Ramadhan,the whole family would go out straight after iftar for their Terawih. And everyday without fail they would wake up early even not during Ramadhan for their Subuh prayers.
There's the Chinese couple on the 6th floor who dun have any children yet. The wife is always meticulously cleaning. Vacumning very day after work, mopping everyday, wiping here and there or ironing in the hall as she watches Tv. She even sweeps the floor at 6 am in the morning before she goes to work!! Imagine that!! And the hubby might occasionally come back in thw wee hours of the nite after a looonggg day at the office. You can tell from the way he drags himself into the house and flungs his laptop on the sofa and he just flops himself down for a 15 mins rest afterwhich he takes a bath and goes to bed. On other days, he just slacks around, watching TV, doing something on his laptop or just chilling at the windows while he puffs away on his ciggie.Occasionally he helps his wife with the housework, gives her shoulder massages and sometimes they make out while standing at the windows in full clear view of moi!! heheheh Seldom lah get to see that free show mah ...
The most interesting family would be the young Malay couple on the 3rd floor right across from my house. They are similiar to my family being a young family with only one son minus the fact they dun have my mum there heheheh.. The wife's always carrying the kids here and there, cleaning or folding clothes while the hubby is tall and lanky like my hubby and everyday he stays up till the wee hours of the nite staring at his PC. I think he composes music for fun or does graphic design I think cos I can sometimes hear nice music coming from his window(at 4 am in the morning the softest sound becomes clear you know!) or I can see him holding up his artwork to scrutinize it. Sometimes he just stands at his windows, smoking his ciggie at just stares out.. Hopefully he didn't notice me at my sofa or window!! hehe and once every 2-3 months this couple would have a Hugeeeeeeeee quarrel... mostly about money.. they shout at the top of their voices at 1 am in the morning u see so I can hear rather clearly even though I try not to...I've even met them under my block quarreling loudly.their poor son kept being pushed between them.. poor boy.He's only about 2yrs old.
There's many more stories I can tell you guys but....The thing is, call me nosey or makcik makcik kepo if u must, but I dun purposely try to find out about these neighbours of mine.It's just funny how much you can learn about someone or something when you just pay enuff attention.And how exposed we really are even in the comfort of our own homes... scary isn't it that a stranger can know so much about your family just by standing at her window???
Hmmmm .. I wonder wat the families in the oppesite block make out of my family?? hehehe would be interesting to find out won't be??I wonder......
Wistful for Love
6:18 PM
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~HI 5~
Well, Hubby, Apit and me together with my best friends and their families have a date with these guys in May.Ohhh just can't wait.. Looks like a yearly ritual for us to go to these kinds of events together at least once a year.. Eiiii tak sabar nyer aku.. Eh? mcm aku plak yg gairah nak jumpa Hi 5 eh?? heheh can't wait to see Apit's reaction to his fave group, to see him jumping and dancing to their tunes... hmm must save money so can buy for him some goodies there...eh Yanni, make sure this time your kids have enuff sleep ok!
On another note, a good friend of mine is going thru a tough phase rite now. What may be happy news for some others might be such a drastic let down for her.. As I am typing, she is on her way to know the results.. Yanni and I are waiting in anticipation and eagerness respectively for her news..I dunno whether I should be happy or sad for her.. after knowing what she is going thru now, I hope the results will go her way.. she has so much planned for herself and family.. But just remember, be it good news or bad, we'll be here for you dear friend.. Hope to see you later and in smiles..InsyAllah.
Wistful for Love
1:23 PM
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~Happy Days~Been a happy week for us... Hubby's smiling more and is more cheerful, seeming more like the guy I knew 8 years ago... Been on a few dates with hubby the past week,while Apit was at his Nyai's place..
Hubby bought for me several gifts.. Thank you dear... It's been a loooonnggg time since he bought me anything... So happy especially for my new pair of glasses to replace my now crooked ones..Also been so loooonngggg time since I saw hubby so happy..Well,better be grateful and bask in the joy while it last ya... Hopefully there'll be more good thing coming our way ya hubby?? InsyAllah...
Hmmm I am anticipating more good things actually... Seems like I've settled most of my major debts this month.. so hopefully by next month I can start settling the smaller debts then help hubby with his loans... and hopefully by this year we can settle all of our debts and start saving more and going on our so longggg deprieved holidays .. and mebbe , just mebbe start saving up for our family car ... hubby can start going for his driving lessons..
Oohhh there's just so many things we plan to do ... sigh for now, I guess we can only take one things at a time and InsyAllah one day, we will achieve all our dreams.. For now, we are just so grateful for all that we have and basking in the glow of happiness that is transcending upon us temporarily before we are oveshadowed again by the gloominess of the dark clouds...
InsyAllah by God's grace and beneloventness, we will one day, lead the happy and contented lives we've always dreamt of.. We dun ask for our lives to be an easy one, nor do we ask that we are blessed with wealth, for wealth does not guarantee happiness.. we just ask that we are more released from all the problems that once hindered us from achieving all that we want to ..InsyAllah... with perseverance and patience we will achieve it...
For now, dear hubby, as I've always said, be patient for good things come to those who are. kalau dah ditakdirkan bukan rezki kita, there's nothing we can do. If it's meant to be, InsyAlahh it will be ours. Wateva He throws our way, it is a strength of our endurance and faith in Him. If we get thru it, we are that much stronger. And have faith that we shall get thru all the obstacles together..
Wistful for Love
12:50 PM
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~Happy days are here!~It's a rare occasion when I would have happy days so I am engulfing the joy while it lasts.. been a wonderful few days for hubby and me.. I've not seen him so happy for a loonnnnggggggg time.. he's more cheerful nowadays and seems more like the guy I met 8 years ago...
We've been on a few dates together the past few days..Hubby bought for ourselves a Muvo and new pair of glasses to replace my now crooked and old one.. Thank you hubby..Apit is at his Nyai's place.Fetching him home today.. hmmm might ajak him go jalan jalan if Mr Sun decides to come out and smile down on us today... Its been raining since morning and even the office feels like north pole!
This happiness won't last very long so we are just basking in the light while it does.. Sigh if only it'll last forever.. I haven't felt so peaceful and contented for a longggg time like I do now.Anyway, for whateva we've been given, we are thankful He lets us have it even if it's for a short while..
Its 3.30pm on a cool Saturday and here I am still stuck in the office. Mr David Chua!! I am so sick of being forced to wait for you!! I wanna go backkkkkkkkkkkkk!! Idiot!! I wann close the details lah....arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!Darn!! If not for you, I could have gone back at 1.30pm just now!!
Wistful for Love
3:05 PM
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