Friday is here yet again .. hmm why dun I feel any diff??mebbe becoz I still have to werk tomolo? And the past two days and werk was so hectic.. especially today...not forgetting the fact tat I slept at 5 am this morning after chatting wif freon and Lilac on MSN..
Dunno why find it so hard to log off yesterday .. erkekek but had fun chatting wif them and on the other window, I chatted wif my guy colleagues who were on the nite shift... It was fun teasing each other ...
People kept saying tat I am getting so fat!!! well compared to my pre marriage size, I m HUGEEEE now.. initially I didn't let wat people say get to me but eventually, I started getting upset at the state I am in now.. difficult to find new clothes tat fit.. jeans getting worn out in between my thighs..when i look at myself in the mirror.. i was shocked tat i let myself become who i am today ..
Its not a matter of wat people think .. I have always tot that wat I feel is important.. sufficient tat i am happy wif myself.. well tat has changed .. i am now so depressed ..
I look like such a makcik now.. and i'm only 26!!! I am resolving to make myself feel good about myself again .. to make myslef look good not for others but for my self confidence and for hubby ... he is as thin as a straw and i am as fat as a??? hmm hippo?? eeewwww .. we look like Laurel and Hardy man!!!
Then I saw the show Shrek2 .. shrek and fiona are hideous .. yet they are happy the way they are .. their relationship suffered when they tried to change themselves to be who they are not .. eventually they decided to stay just the way they were and they lived happily ever after..
Well it IS a fairytale after all .. doesn't werk in real life man!! to make myself feel good i have to look good .. its so depressing when i try to shop for werk clothes and have no choice but to buy huge t-shirts and aunty styled blouses becoz trendy clothes are not made in sizes for people like me !! even if they did, the price tags goes way beyond my budget ..i no longer look presentable .. i look like a sloppy old hag!!! uwahhhhh
Lilac !!! helpppppp
Wistful for Love
11:35 PM
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